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I would no longer like to be a FOL ... Advice Please?

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Now before you say, holy crap that is a lot of words, I will inform you that there is the whole thing in a nutshell at the bottom of this post.
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Hello,

Now I don't know how most will react to the title but it is not entirely true. Let me explain my situation:

I consider myself to be a TFOL (16) and have been building Lego sets and my own models for most of my life. Through this process I  have created quite the collection. From owning Lego train sets all the way back to the BNSF to all modulars and most UCS, I do much so consider myself an avid collector. I have even tried my share at Lego Investing by buying a few sets and putting them off to resell for later. I jump on all exclusive offers for free promotional mini figures from lego and am always on the look out for good sales on sets. I have a series of different blogs that I check on every once and awhile for news and updates along with a few youtube channels for reviews. Do I let it consume my whole life? No, I still do multiple athletics at my school along with staying social and more or less what one may be called an "inbetweener" on the whole high school food chain. Now I am sure that quite a few other fans of Lego might agree that this is normal behavior for a fan of Lego, but after quite a bit of criticism from school friends, this is not all what a normal teenager's life should be. I am sure that many people at my school, or at any school would assume me for being strange and unnormal behavior for a teenager to still be avidly collecting Lego sets but I never have said anything about it and almost no ones knows... but its hard to keep it under wraps, having friends over always makes issues and making me have to make an excuse why I have a Death Star on my desk... Oh, and I will let you know that not many girls find the talent "building lego" as an attraction.  

Hence my decision to end this obsession, move on with my life, welcome the dog years... only it seems to be harder then I thought it would have been. I have deleted my Flickr, all bookmarked tabs of Lego blogs and removed all evidence of Lego from my room. Yet I still find myself looking up Brickset and other blogs for news because, well, I am not sure what else to do. When ever I find myself at Target or in the mall where my Lego store is, its just too temping to buy one of the sets because lets all face it, the feeling of cracking open a new set is always a good time. After some time, I realized that I cannot end this passion, after all it has been a major part of my life. 

I feel like there will be that reply saying that if that everyone in this world was normal, then this world would be a very boring place and I do agree with that. However being a Lego collector on this level (Checking for constant deals, having to wake up in the middle of the night needed to go to the bathroom but unsure if there is a piece on the floor that would inevitably be the doom of my foot, going to conventions) is not what I would like to do my entire life. I would like to move onto the world of Product Design, Architecture, or Interior Design. I have begun to learn CAD and am moving in a direction that I am happy with, I just cannot drop this obsession. That is another thing, LEGO IS SO GOSH DARN EXPENSIVE!!! Since I am a collector and I don't want to miss out on any models that I want that go to a series (talking about you Modular Buildings) I end up spending my money on them, rather than on other projects that will hopefully boost me in a good career path.

Missing on a set also hurts me. The after market is a jerk. I missed out on the Haunted House and do regret it. I am also faced with the issue that if I miss a flagship model, it is going to bite me in the you know where and I will not have the chance to buy it at a decent price. 

So here I am, looking ahead at life and stuff and realizing that Lego is something that I should not drop. It is a good way to practice 3 dimensional skills and mechanics of art and design. 

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^^^^^ Anyone to lazy to read the above ^^^^^

Would like to live a normal teenage life
Passionate and a very active FOL
Would like to stop being the very passionate FOL that I am
My question is as stated below

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I come to this forum to ask what is the best way to bring to manage the obsessive behaviors of Lego collecting and building and bring it down to a minimum?

I would also like to mention that this article is in no way to be in any offense to the Lego Community. Keep building the amazing stuff you do and keep the passion that you do have! When I say not normal, I am not calling anyone here not normal as I do believe that normal is what ever you want it to mean. I would just like to do something other than build and collect Lego bricks and I currently curious on what a proper path would be to take. 


bendybadgerTheBigLegoskiCaptainClutchnychromastonepharmjodsnowhitieprincedraven1265
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Comments

  • PaperballparkPaperballpark UKMember Posts: 3,390
    Didn't read the massive bit of text (sorry!), just the summary and question. Basically, you need to choose one or two themes to concentrate on, and stick to that. I know it'll be hard, but there's not infinite money, so it's the only way.
    MrMonsieurGreen
  • Mandalorian_BuilderMandalorian_Builder Member Posts: 197
    Social media has made me hate click-bait, and this was written the same way XD Waaaay too long of a post.
    MrMonsieurGreen
  • HuwHuw Brickset Towers, Hampshire, UKAdministrator Posts: 6,390
    edited July 2015
    The trick is not to let your cravings get the better of you and spoil the hobby. Just buy the sets you want to build now and enjoy and not those that you think you should by just in case you'll like them at some point in the future, or that you think are going to be worth something later.

    The best 'cure' for someone your age is to do things 'normal' teenagers do as well: go out drinking, to concerts, to parties, with girls and balance those activities with LEGO. 

    I guess the old adage 'everything in moderation' is key.
    TheBigLegoskiMrMonsieurGreenAdzbadboyprincedraven
  • FauchFauch FranceMember Posts: 2,256
    edited July 2015

    you probably shouldn't give too much importance about what some teenagers think. they can be very judgemental.

    BumblepantspharmjodMrMonsieurGreenAdzbadboy
  • bendybadgerbendybadger 127.0.0.1 ::1Member Posts: 1,141
    I would be honest about your Lego obsession - you say not many girls find "building Lego" an attraction but it is not the only thing about you.  It is an interest.  My wife hates Lego but still manages to love me.  It is not your sole defining attribute so be open and honest with people and you will find some will actually think your quirkiness is an attractive quality.

    Obsess a little less and enjoy life a little more.  There are sets your will miss out on and would love but can't afford.  Don't let the Lego rule your life.  It is something to do that you enjoy but you are obviously wanting to do other things as well like drink and socialise like any other "youth". Lego will be still be there in the future.  If like me you continue purchasing at some point you have no space left to keep expanding so you then start to thin and just keep to the sets you enjoy.

    I find the best way to stop the obsession is to either take some time away from it.  Yes it is is difficult and you will sneak back but it will force you to take stock of what is important to you.  You have to accept at some point that although collecting does make you happy, there are other things out there that will do the same. Learning other skills such as CAD will probably be very valuable to you in the future. A good career is important as it will help you afford some of the sets. 

    I now have developed a more pragmatic approach to collecting.  I do not know anyone on here that can afford every set they want so just accept it and move on and enjoy what you have and not what you don't have.

    Apologies for the wandering way this is structured but wanted to put something down for you whilst my mind is not too tired.
    TheBigLegoskiaimlesspursuitsnychromastoneVortexMrMonsieurGreenAdzbadboybrickedinmadforLEGO
  • FauchFauch FranceMember Posts: 2,256
    well, the girls at that age know they will be judged on who they go out with. the guy who plays with lego may be nice and cute, they'll still be mocked if others know they frequent him, whereas if they go out with the captain of the football team they'll be admired and envied.
    DougoutMrMonsieurGreen
  • MrMonsieurGreenMrMonsieurGreen Member Posts: 15
    Didn't read the massive bit of text (sorry!), just the summary and question. Basically, you need to choose one or two themes to concentrate on, and stick to that. I know it'll be hard, but there's not infinite money, so it's the only way.
    That is absolutely ok, I wouldn't have read the massive text myself to be honest, but hey, for whoever wanted a bit of context, well lets just say I gave it to them. It feels weird that I wrote more there than on most assignments of history homework...

    I do feel like an idiot to not have tried that, seems very logical. I guess I was focused on only buying 1 set per year or something like that. I knew that wasn't going to work... this however is very ideal. Thank you! 

    So if I were to narrow down my choices, it would end up with:

    Advanced Models
    Star Wars UCS
    Mixels
    Marvel Super Heros

    Why all the cool stuff gotta be so expensive... well I guess that goes for quite a lot of the items in life that have a price tag attached to them... *Sigh*
  • donutboydonutboy U.K.Member Posts: 681
    It's interesting that you feel the need to force yourself away from the hobby that you love because of what, embarrassment over what your friends think. Trust me, in a few years you'll have much more important, young adult, stuff to spend your money on and also much less time on your hands to build Lego anyway.
    That's what happened to me anyway.
    Then, when I settled down and started a family I got back into Lego and really enjoy it again now, and believe me, I still get crap from my buddies for playing with Lego.

    One thing I would advise. Don't be tempted to sell your collection to buy, say, a festival ticket for instance, that will definitely hurt later on. Stick your collection in your folks loft and you'll have great fun in some years time.
    Big_SalMrMonsieurGreen
  • MrMonsieurGreenMrMonsieurGreen Member Posts: 15
    Looks like I needed to refresh my page a bit more, thank you everyone for your advice!

    Got some other Titles as well:
    Lego Building Teen? You will be surprised to see what he wants to do next!
    Curious on 10 new astounding tips on how to manage a Lego Collection?
    ...... Hmmm, I wonder if there is a job opening at buzzfeed for me?

    Huw 
    "Spoiling the Hobby" is an interesting way of putting it and will have to keep that in mind. I have not thought of it that way but it does sound true. It really isn't necessary for me to try to hit the exclusive 5003082, I mean it would be cool to have the exclusive set but is it essential? No. The wise words of Huw on the subject of Carpe Diem are well appreciated.


    Very good points that you mentioned, I especially enjoyed "you have to accept at some point that although collecting does make you happy, there are other things out there that will do the same." I will be honest, I would have expected for more posts saying for me to stick with Lego in some way or another but I think that line puts the idea of stoping/slowing collecting down in a positive sound.

    Fauch said:

    Well as long as they do not know that I have a lego collection all is good. Teenagers are interesting people. So much judgment... 

  • MrMonsieurGreenMrMonsieurGreen Member Posts: 15
    donutboy said:
    It's interesting that you feel the need to force yourself away from the hobby that you love because of what, embarrassment over what your friends think. Trust me, in a few years you'll have much more important, young adult, stuff to spend your money on and also much less time on your hands to build Lego anyway.
    That's what happened to me anyway.
    Then, when I settled down and started a family I got back into Lego and really enjoy it again now, and believe me, I still get crap from my buddies for playing with Lego.

    One thing I would advise. Don't be tempted to sell your collection to buy, say, a festival ticket for instance, that will definitely hurt later on. Stick your collection in your folks loft and you'll have great fun in some years time.
    As much as I look forward to collage and stuff the same I do not. But hey, thats life. But also thank you for the advice. 

    Now I wouldn't sell any of my normal brick sets, but at times I will not lie, I have thought about selling a few Hero Factory/Bionicle sets.
  • FauchFauch FranceMember Posts: 2,256
    yeah, as long as you do exactly the same as them, I guess all is good...
    MrMonsieurGreen
  • ISDAvengerISDAvenger Member Posts: 203
    Do not change your love of a hobby to meet the needs of other people. I often wonder what people think when I make large purchases at the Lego Store or Walmart, or etc. My love for the hobby overules what they think. It is a trend in todays society people change their lifestyle to meet the demands of the "in crowd". If people cannot accept you for who you are, then they are not worth knowing.

    That being said there is life outside of a hobby, and it is important to realize that. You must find a balance that makes you happy. Select a certain area and only buys sets that you really want....and versus impulse buying a set that you may regret down the road.

    BLUF, be yourself, enjoy life, and who gives a damn what the world thinks. Its your life, you live it they way you want too.
    TheBigLegoskiaimlesspursuitsMrMonsieurGreen
  • MrMonsieurGreenMrMonsieurGreen Member Posts: 15
    Fauch said:

    Do not change your love of a hobby to meet the needs of other people. I often wonder what people think when I make large purchases at the Lego Store or Walmart, or etc. My love for the hobby overules what they think. It is a trend in todays society people change their lifestyle to meet the demands of the "in crowd". If people cannot accept you for who you are, then they are not worth knowing.

    That being said there is life outside of a hobby, and it is important to realize that. You must find a balance that makes you happy. Select a certain area and only buys sets that you really want....and versus impulse buying a set that you may regret down the road.

    BLUF, be yourself, enjoy life, and who gives a damn what the world thinks. Its your life, you live it they way you want too.
    A very interesting pair of contradicting comments on the whole be your self side of the conversation. I think I find what makes me happy is when other people are happy with me, Lego collecting isn't really something that is praised among most teenagers. 

    But the impulse buy is a very good point and is one of my issues. As much as really think that MicroFighter is cool, those 10$ could go to a larger purchase. Yeah I will admit, Im working on it. 
  • GallardoLUGallardoLU USAMember Posts: 644
    edited July 2015
    Ok, so I'm not much older than you but far enough along to look back (28) and think on what i might have done different. here is my take on things for ya. First, you sound quite a lot like me, i was always happiest when others were having a good time too, but its not possible to spend all your time with friends, so what does any person do? find something they love and fill the empty time with that. Lego for us is one of those things, but its not the only thing.  as a lot of others have said its all a balance. Some day you'll find a girl that steals your heart and there isn't a hobby in the world that could get between either of you (expect to enter a dark age around this time). so hold on to every thing you love to do but leave room for new loves. I guarantee if you can do that you'll be able to look back on life years from now and smile. all the "weird" stuff, the sports, Poker Parties, getting chased out of parks by police... those all will shape you. embrace it all :)


    bendybadgerMrMonsieurGreenTheLoneTensoraimlesspursuits
  • BrickarmorBrickarmor USAMember Posts: 1,257
    I did read the entire post, and the replies thus far. It's normal for you to be more concerned with other people's opinions of you at your age and also to be experiencing some ambivalence toward Lego. But I would defend rather than downplay your Lego hobby if indeed you don't wish to cut it out completely. Many people mistakenly believe "Legos are just for kids," and you could potentially set them straight by directing them to he more advanced models. Which is where tailoring your collection comes in: stick to the "wow" sets, the ones that hurt your wallet but are clearly impressive to pretty much everyone. 

    This comes from someone who never had to face your dilemma, but the social pressures to conform come in countless varieties, and the personal (emotional and psychological) economy of give and take is not the same for everyone. Whatever choices you make will involve gains and losses, some of which may not be predictable. It's easy for adults to say "don't change for anyone," but it's easier said than done.  
    MrMonsieurGreen
  • dannyrwwdannyrww WisconsinMember Posts: 1,323
    Be who you are. I collect comics, toys, and play with puppets (semi-professionally too). I've been able to make these things (including Lego) part of my job as a teacher. I am happily married (for 15 years to a wonderful woman who puts with my hobbies) and have three great kids I can share my hobbies with. I guess my point is that the end you need to be who you are, and if people are going to judge that then they are not worth it, and you will find people who will love you for who you are. That being said I am not you, so do what makes you feel best. These are just the decisions I made.
    MrMonsieurGreenlegogrrl4
  • MrShinyAndNewMrShinyAndNew Member Posts: 240
    As a teenager, you are under enormous pressure to conform to what others think is the right thing. It sounds cliche, but you have to be true to yourself. When I was 16 I didn't have a girlfriend and had trouble dating. Eventually, in university, I met a girl I ended up marrying. So, as frustrating as it may sound, maybe you just need to be patient. Maybe you are trying to impress the wrong girls with your collection. You need to find the ones that like collecting things, or that like Star Wars, or that like design or architecture. Or, just find one that likes everything non-Lego about you.  I don't think you should have to make excuses for what your hobby is. You sound like you have an adequate social life. Ignore the nay-sayers.

    Also, it's easy for me to say, but frankly I'm not interested in being friends with someone who looks down on me because I have a room full of Lego. What do they have instead? A garage full of empty beer cans? A room full of porno? A fancy car they tune-up regularly? A shelf full of bowling trophies? Pfft. I have a box full of minifig heads, sorted and stacked so that I can create a fig with just the right expression. Isn't that better? It is for me. If that is a problem for someone, that I am not like them, well, eff that. 

    The world is bigger than your high-school. You are different from some of the kids there, but not that different from many other kids your age and adults around the world. You're among friends here. Be yourself!
    VorpalRyuTheBigLegoskiMrMonsieurGreen
  • matticus_bricksmatticus_bricks Member Posts: 648
    As a recent teen myself (I'm 21 now), this topic struck a chord with me. The best advice I have to give is that you probably shouldn't bother with the type of people who would judge you for having a hobby anyway. In my experience, I've never encountered anyone who has reacted with disgust when they found out about my Lego hobby. They usually say "oh that's cool!" and I've even talked to some parents browsing in the Lego aisle who've said "I wish there were more creative young people like you!" Honestly, I've judged myself, questioning my own hobby, much more than anyone else has. Granted, I've mostly come out of my dark ages in the past two years while you're still dealing with high school drama. I'm also not a typical 21 year old (I didn't go out on my 21st, hated my first beer, I'm single, and I don't hang with my friends too much), but I guess my point is that I'm happy with my life. you have to be happy with how you see yourself. If you think that your hobby is getting out of hand, and you'd like to have a more natural social life, then maybe it is time to tone it down. Put some things away, maybe sell some of the stuff you really don't want, but don't get rid of it all because you will regret it someday. 

    I hope this helps. Good luck with whatever you decide to do. :)
    VorpalRyuTheBigLegoskiMrMonsieurGreenlegogrrl4
  • DougoutDougout Member Posts: 888
    Girls of all ages get more and more pressure by society and the media to classify guys between nerds and men every day.  Just understand those that do are all dumb, they conform because they can not think for themselves.  There are nerdier chicks though, or outcasts, they would probably take interest.

    I very much relate to what you said.  I was in my early 20's when I got back into Lego.  I was somewhat forced into my dark ages by my parents and missed the beginning to the Golden Age of Lego because of it.  I've had kids insult me over Lego before at a party.  You have to understand most of these kids are going to go nowhere in life though.  They only insult to get a reaction and if you don't get mad then they don't succeed.  Try to come up with witty responses to a Lego insult and just be prepared to say it to someone that tries to talk shit.  Remain confident and nice and you will score more points with girls than a bully does.

    Lego shouldn't consume your life though.  I used to build everything, but I haven't built anything in 18 months (I have quite a few sets waiting for me which is wonderful!!).  You can still buy the sets you want, you don't have to build them.  I would only have one or two cool sets to display in your room.  Having one good one on display gives the impression that you are creative and unique but not weird.  90% of the people that see one of my models seems to like it.  I still do get that one idiot that says some stupid passive aggressive comment.  Most of the time I will respond with something like "They're planning to make the next moon rover out of Legos" or "I use Legos in my robotics class", just something that sort of ties how much more involved Legos are than just a toy.  Or if they really are smug I'll kindly point to my Imperial Shuttle and say "That's $800 on eBay, I paid $200 for mine, how many did you buy?".

    The struggle is real my friend.  You have to balance between limiting the amount that something represents you and being confident in your own style and characteristics.
    VorpalRyuTheBigLegoskiMrMonsieurGreen
  • cheshirecatcheshirecat Member Posts: 5,332
    edited July 2015
    I would go the other way, you call it yourself an obsession (which probably isn't healthy) and I would imagine that you could read your post and see it as an addiction that's starting to impede other aspects of your life. 

    Have a trial separation from the brick. Pack it all away, definitely don't sell it (other than the bionicle/hero factory :wink: ) and give it a couple of months without buying lego, playing with Lego or visiting Lego websites.

    Enjoy life, enjoy friends, the Lego isn't going anywhere. If the absence of Lego in your life makes you sad then you can always go back to it, you'll still have your Lego, there'll still be Lego in the shops.

    But right now go cold turkey, don't cut down to one theme, cut it all. You're at that incredible time when you transition to an adult, the freedom, the opportunity and the new experiences and a need for money. Don't take unnecessary baggage, which you seem to think, and I would agree, Lego might be at this stage in your life. There's nothing to lose in taking a break and possibly a whole lot to gain with the extra free time, money and head space. Sure be true to yourself, but taking a break from one time consuming hobby doesn't stop you being you. No one would tell an achoholic not to stop drinking because they need to be true to theirself. 

    And finally, never ask a bunch of drunks if its time to stop drinking! :wink: 
    andheVorpalRyuTheBigLegoskiMrMonsieurGreenNatebw
  • MAGNINOMINISUMBRAMAGNINOMINISUMBRA Member Posts: 977
    A quick point from someone more than double your age - You might be surprised at just how many of the 'cool girls' have Boxed Barbie or Beanie babies collections hidden in their bedroom closets so THIER friends don't think them uncool... Just an honest observation from a father of teenage girls and a realtor who gets to see what LOTS of people hide in their closets!
    VorpalRyuTheBigLegoskiMrMonsieurGreen
  • plasmodiumplasmodium UKMember Posts: 1,936
    As a 21 year old and a very inactive AFOL, I can kind of see where the OP is coming from. I had a similar crisis (on a smaller scale, cause I had way less Lego than you do!) when I was about your age.

    First of all.. like others have said, don't put to much stock in what other teenagers think. They have their own insecurities etc, and just because the 'cool' people think something, doesn't mean it's 'right'. Also, don't completely change who you are just to get a girlfriend. Find someone who likes who you are. Which, now that I've written it, sounds really cheesy. Take this advice with a pinch of salt, of course, because I've never been in your exact situation.

    In my case, my Lego sort of passed into communal ownership with my little brother (5 years younger than me), and I would guess soon, he's going to get tired of the Lego city we have displayed in our room. Then we'll have to figure out what to do with it all. My plan is that some of it I can sell off to other collectors on here or eBay at the worst, but my favourite sets would go in a box in the loft, maybe to rediscover later, maybe for my (potential) kids.

    But I'll always have a few sets on display. Partly because these days, 'geek chic' is kind of 'in', and having a classic space set or a Star Wars/Back to the Future/other pop culture reference set on display is cool. I also have a Lego Formula 1 car on display, because it's a vague interest of mine.

    That said, if buying Lego is a proper compulsion/addiction it may be wise to certainly scale back if not stop for a while. As people above have suggested, just collect one line, or maybe even limit yourself to, say, one big set and x small sets per year. I used to lust after almost any new Star Wars set that came out, but after forcing myself not to buy any, it stopped being such a desire. I even considered just doing a collection of all the clone trooper variants, but after being a few, I thought "I'm never going to display these, and they don't really bring me happiness", so I gave up on that.

    This is quite rambling, but I hope there's something in there that can help!

    (Also, apologies for any spelling mistakes - I'm on mobile, and I just know there'll be some weird autocorrect misspelling in there somewhere that I didn't notice!)
    MrMonsieurGreen
  • ShibShib UKMember Posts: 5,115
    One thing that I think few people are prepared to admit is that having a 'dark age' is not altogether a bad thing...yes it means you will miss out on some sets and some of those you might really want, but it will make you appreciate those sets you've kept stashed away all the more.

    There is a balance to be found though, if you feel like your collection is ruining you life then why keep it up? However if you find going cold turkey leaves you bored and miserable then that's not a good solution either. I think @cheshirecat 's solution of packing everything away but not selling it to see how you feel is the best advice...if you have modulars etc then keeping them for the future will best best in either scenario - if you decide you really are better off without you'll be able to get a bit of cash for other things in the future, if you realise you want LEGO in your life then you haven't lost anything. 

    Although I was in dark ages during my teenage years, it was at that time that I became comfortable in being the geeky/nerdy type I am, and ultimately found myself a lot happier for finding that comfort over trying to fit in with people because it's what is expected.
    cheshirecatTheBigLegoskiMrMonsieurGreen
  • cheshirecatcheshirecat Member Posts: 5,332
    It sounds to me like the OP is somewhat obsessive in nature (I suspect most of us here are to a greater or lesser degree) which is why I would be less worried about the negative aspects of trying to fit in, we're not talking about hiding the nerdiness (product design, CAD, architecture are all pretty nerdy too) but rather taking away something you obsess over to give yourself some room to breath, develop and find out who you are over the next few formative years. You aren't defined by LEGO but an obsession with it might inhibit your ability to find yourself. As would any obsession that occupies too much time and head space - especially one that you feel you have to hide from people.
    MrMonsieurGreen
  • MrMonsieurGreenMrMonsieurGreen Member Posts: 15
    I have been reading the comments and I appreciate each and every one. I will try to reply to them shortly.

    I think I might clarify a bit more on the "term of obsessiveness". For me, I usually only spend 10-25 mins a day looking up Lego news on the Internet and reading articles from various blogs. I do collect all of the modulars but as far as other advanced sets its just time to time, it has also been awhile since a UCS has been purchased. The last one has either been the R2-D2 or the B-wing. I can say that on average I have reached 250-500 dollars on buying sets per year. When I mentioned the promotions about the figures, I only buy the sets when there is one, I don't spend another 20$ on the after market. Working my minimum wage job helps but when I look at other people my age, the normal thing is to end up buying a playstation 4/ x-box, new games or headphones, a new lacross helmet, while I'm here buying a toy for children. They also talk quite a bit about first person shooter games (I don't understand the thrill of killing virtual people), Fifa, or about their sports teams and mean while I'm sitting here will all I know is about Lego. If they want to know what the value of a set or when a new set comes out then il try to point them in the right direction but at the same time no one does/cares. 

    So back to the original point, I guess I am slowly narrowing down the problem. I am trying to find something else to do with my life, but I keep ending up back at the Brick. 

    Also, I appreciate everyone who has said that I stand up for what I enjoy. However as much as I would enjoy to try to do that, and being the self conscious person that I am, well I am defiantly going to change. I have already impressed people with CAD and so I'm going in a good direction... Again... cannot give up the brick. 

    I do appreciate everyone for chiming in their opinion and sharing all of their stories. I think what I am leaning to is seriously limiting myself/putting everything in the closet for some time and try to find something else to do.

    Please let me know for any further suggestions because I know it's still going to be hard for me to give it up.
  • MrMonsieurGreenMrMonsieurGreen Member Posts: 15
    Thank you! I will have to add running from the police to this list of "Things I need to do while I'm a Teenager". In all seriousness, thank you for your input as I know that I will find some other items to fill my time, just need to figure out what. As Huw said, "everything in moderation".
    I do agree that some of the sets do impose a wow impact, The Tower of Orthanc has always been a good one for that. And I could not agree more for the "don't change for anyone."
    I go to a reasonably small school so I take what I have and appreciate the friends that I do have so it is really the best I can do... but that does now make me curious if anyone of them do have a bowling trophy shelf. But yes, thank you, for all of your words of motivation in the 1st paragraph.  Also I am very glad that there is a Lego Community. It always fascinates me when I see a new technique that someone has done or even a new model, building what ever you is something that is very cool.
    Absolutely do not want to end up with any regrets as you said. Glad to hear that you are happy with you decisions. With my post above I think I have figured out what path I should take, thank you for your input!
    Dougout said:
    I must agree with you there with the, "That's $800 on eBay, I paid $200 for mine, how many did you buy?". That usually makes the person think a bit more about the worth of Lego. I wouldn't say that Lego consumes my life, I'm not running head over heels to get every single comic con set, but as more or less stated above, just probably would be best for me to find some other options that life offers. Your comment was much appreciated.

    Its going to be hard to do but I think it does not seem like a bad idea. And also I did think about the, "never ask a bunch of drunks if its time to stop drinking" but it does not seem to be the case here for all that I have seen is a flood of advice (much more than I anticipated) and it seems to have helped quite a bit! I guess I will have to see how it works. Thank you
    I guess maybe a break is the best option. After collecting the Marvel super hero for some time, I think I can give it a rest. And yes, thank you for you did give quite a bit of information that absolutely helped. Being an only child, it has Lego has stuck with me, and since I had no other company than me and my conscience, lego was the item left for be to build with. I cannot pass it down for a brother to enjoy but i believe my best option would be to just store it away for some time. 
    Shib said:
    A very fair/agreeable comment. I must say I am still debating in my mind if the Modulars are something that should be continued to be collected or if it should just be put off for some time and would be the real catalyst for the end. However I am up to date on them so I would have to wait at least 3 years to miss one... at that point I would also be in college so that decision would have to be made there. 

    Thank you everyone for all of your commentary as for each one did help!
  • VorpalRyuVorpalRyu AustraliaMember Posts: 2,232
    edited July 2015
    You've got a few ways you can tackle your dilemma:
    A. Embrace your dark ages & sell off your Lego collection or put it in storage.
    B. Try to be one of the cool kids & have Lego as a secret hobby.
    C. Scale back the collecting & try to reduce the Lego talk in non-FOL settings.
    D. Ignore the jibes, maybe find a new circle of friends (ones that aren't so judgemental) & keep building.

    Personally, I went with option D, I happily continued to do what interested me, sci-fi, toys (especially Lego), comics, video games, etc. As for those 'cool' kids, forget them, they most likely won't be part the 'it' crowd once you're out of high school.

    Being into Lego gives a lot of geek/nerd cred & some girls, including some really awesome ones, really go for that...
    madforLEGOmatticus_bricksxiahna
  • TheLoneTensorTheLoneTensor MericaMember Posts: 3,950
    You can't change who you are, lest you compromise your principles and then just find yourself miserable.  If you like Lego, stay with it.  If you don't, give it a rest.  Don't let other people dictate how you should enjoy your life.

    That being written, I tend to think the dark ages are unavoidable for the most part, and are a necessary chrysalis phase in the evolution of a Lego fan from a kid playing with toys to an adult realizing that it's ok to continue to play with these toys :)  Whether that's true or not, it's quite ok to give things a rest to recharge your batteries for when your inner Lego gets triggered later in life.
    VorpalRyumadforLEGO
  • FauchFauch FranceMember Posts: 2,256
    Working my minimum wage job helps but when I look at other people my age, the normal thing is to end up buying a playstation 4/ x-box, new games or headphones, a new lacross helmet, while I'm here buying a toy for children. They also talk quite a bit about first person shooter games (I don't understand the thrill of killing virtual people), Fifa, or about their sports teams and mean while I'm sitting here will all I know is about Lego.
    Well "friendship" at that age seems to depend a lot on playing the same video game. there were usually groups dedicated to certain games. when the group decides to switch game, you may get under pressure to switch it too or they may lose interest in you.
    VorpalRyu
  • tedwardtedward CanadaMember Posts: 163
    With all due respect and love for a fellow human being: GET OVER IT!

    Any girl who does not want to date you because of your hobby is not worth dating.

    Any "friend" who seriously mocks or derides you hobby is not any such thing.

    Headphones? Lacrosse gear? Playstations?  Where will they be in 20 years? 

    I am 48 years old and I still have LEGO my parents bought me when I was 7 years old.

    Sure go do other things, set yourself a monthly or yearly "LEGO budget" to limit spending for now. All fine ideas.

    Heck even take a break from LEGO for a year or two or three. LEGO is like an old friend that never judges and will still be there no matter how long you are away.

    You are doing just fine from what you have written (yes I read the long version). In ten years you may not even remember the names of the people in your school who give you a hard time now. Instead you will be enjoying a fantastic career as an engineer or designer or whatever your creativity and hard work, supported and encouraged by little plastic bricks, has allowed you to become.
    madforLEGOVorpalRyumatticus_bricksnicoyagomezSumoLegogmonkey76
  • cheshirecatcheshirecat Member Posts: 5,332
    tedward said:

    Any girl who does not want to date you because of your hobby is not worth dating.

    Although they may be worth having sex with. Get those memories in now before you get married! Give LEGO a break and give shallow, baseless girls a go. When you're 40, married with kids LEGO will still be readily available, 20 something young women not so much. :wink: 
    TheBigLegoskinicoyagomezThanos75tedward
  • BrickarmorBrickarmor USAMember Posts: 1,257
    ^Now there's the barebones voice of experience! :sunglasses: 
  • madforLEGOmadforLEGO Chicagoland USMember Posts: 9,271
    Ahh to be young with real problems instead of worrying about your health, car breaking down, finding an affordable place to live/trying to get a mortgage, not getting fired or let go from work (which tends to not help with the whole 'affording' things).
    Believe me, I'm not being harsh. I used to have the same 'problems' that you do now when I was your age.
    HS tends to have that effect on many. It is also the reason why I stay away from those who wish for their high school days back. I was glad to get out and likened it to being in prison for 4 years.
    You know how many people I talk to from HS? Zero.
    I'll tell you this, 10-20 years from now you will look back and say 'I was worried about what?'

    I would love to have the knowledge I have now and to be that age again but not have to go through high school again.

    Look, be who you are. If you really do not want to be into LEGO anymore due to cost that is one thing, but getting out of it to impress someone is just a disaster waiting to happen IMO.
    Also that jerky aftermarket will help you recoup costs if you decide to sell.

    VorpalRyu
  • FauchFauch FranceMember Posts: 2,256
    edited July 2015
     
    tedward said:

    Headphones? Lacrosse gear? Playstations?  Where will they be in 20 years? 


    I would say I recently decided my money was better spent on legos than on video games due to how quick those lose value, if they even have any at the begining, seeing how easy it is to get them for free through illegal means, since making virtual copies costs nearly nothing in terms of resources or work and without counting the competition from people who now develops software for free.

    of course, by the time your call of duty game lost half of its value or more and became a more attractive buy, the new one came out and all your friends already switched to it. they basically make their money through herd effect.

    VorpalRyu
  • VorpalRyuVorpalRyu AustraliaMember Posts: 2,232
    @MrMonsieurGreen, @tedward & @madforLEGO, both have solid points...

    The girls who weren't interested in me because of my interests, turned out, when I did get a shot with them, they really weren't worth my time. Watch them, over the years to come, many of these shallow, conceited girls will become bitter, nasty women because of the choices they made (a lot of the time due to the men they chose).

    I also have nothing to do with those I went to HS with, unless there are people really worth knowing around you now, you'll move on & make friends with people worth knowing. Some of those around you now, may one day be worth knowing, but they need some time in the real world to mature & become worth knowing.

    & @cheshirecat, its never too late for twenty-something girls, my wife & I got together when she was nineteen & I was thirty one (turned thirty nine this year, she's twenty seven). :D
    bendybadgerLind_Whispererxiahna
  • cheshirecatcheshirecat Member Posts: 5,332
    In three years time it will be too late!  >:)
  • VorpalRyuVorpalRyu AustraliaMember Posts: 2,232
    lol, not really, she's bi & if september goes well.....add six more >:)
    xiahna
  • pharmjodpharmjod 1,170 miles to Wall Drug, USAMember Posts: 2,871
    What the heck just happened to this thread? I am so confused.
    SumoLegoVorpalRyu
  • tamamahmtamamahm Member Posts: 1,938
    Eh. I am not sure how big this is as an issue. What I mean is that I think making a few tweaks, and you are good to go. 
    - It sounds like you want another hobby. That is great. Look for one that fits your interests.
    - You like Lego. Great. If you feel it consumes to much of your time, then tweak. Take one day a week to catch up on the latest info. Figure out the key 2-3 sets you want a year, and focus on those. If you do not want your room covered in Lego, then box them up, but leave out your sets you picked for the year as display. Any friend that makes fun of you for having some cool displays out... They are insane. I can not imagine not liking a boy because they had Lego. That seems stupid, but obviously some girls do not feel the same, and they are not worth your time. 
    - it sounds like you are active in other areas already, great. 
    -The reality is cad, design, etc. does have many 3d elements to it, so you could also morph your lego focus into 3d MOCS or into study of architecture. There is a ton of cool architectures to explore and learn about, and then create. Really understanding the history, understanding their structure and then building them via MOCs or sets, is a way to still keep Lego active, while gaining some new skills and knowledge. 

    Realy, I do not see huge changes needed, but there are ways you can tweak things and make it more towards a direction you want to go/explore. If you are not haooy with tweaks, then just change directions back.



  • TheBigLegoskiTheBigLegoski Amsterdam, NederlandMember Posts: 1,288
    edited July 2015
    @pharmjod ;
    LOL
    @VorpalRyu 's last comment made me frown too. Not sure if this duder connected all the strands either.
    Anyway, @MrMonsieurGreen has been given so much advice that he may now have a new problem. ;)
    What ever you decide to do, I have read your and everybody else's comments here with much interest and enjoyment.
    Here are my two proverbial cents: Dude you should enjoy your college time, or what ever you will do after you graduate from high school. Don't worry about Lego, just store your collection somewhere save, and go out to discover what ever else the world has to offer and enjoy your dark age; enter it boldly! Go party, meet girls, have fun. But most of all do not be afraid of what others think of you, and don't shy away from all the things you enjoy doing and take an interest in because of peer pressure (if those so called 'cool' kids are even really your peers). A fact of life is that not everybody will like you, how ever nice, considerate and upstanding you are. You cannot please everyone, and neither should you attempt to try this.
    I know talk is cheap and all these things are easier said than done. I wish you all the best!
    VorpalRyuSirKevbagsmadforLEGO
  • SumoLegoSumoLego New YorkMember Posts: 11,740
    This thread is only slightly less strange than the 'skip diving' thread.

    Giving up your Lego hobby isn't going transform you into Van Wilder.

    Changing your priorities is what will transform you into Van Wilder.

    Assuming you're interested in becoming Van Wilder.  There are some consequences for pursuing that lifestyle...

    @cheshirecat
    VorpalRyu
  • VorpalRyuVorpalRyu AustraliaMember Posts: 2,232
    @SumoLego, less strange? :wink: 
    @TheBigLegoski, what are you not sure you connected?
    @pharmjod, confused?
    xiahna
  • TheBigLegoskiTheBigLegoski Amsterdam, NederlandMember Posts: 1,288
    @VorpalRyu
    So your wife whom you met eight years ago and who is 27 now, will no longer be a 'twenty-something girl' within three years, but somehow either or both because she is bi (as in bisexual?!) and something hopefully favourable happening in September will ad another mysterious six. Maybe it is me being daft, but if it is not then what ever you wrote is rather absurdly cryptic, if not surreal, or perhaps just utterly nonsensical.
    xiahna
  • VorpalRyuVorpalRyu AustraliaMember Posts: 2,232
    @TheBigLegoski, a certain female friend of ours turns 21 in september & if things continue the way they have been between her & us... Make that nine more years... :smiley: 
    xiahnaTheBigLegoski
  • mathewmathew Member Posts: 2,096
    tedward said:

    Any girl who does not want to date you because of your hobby is not worth dating.

    Although they may be worth having sex with. Get those memories in now before you get married! Give LEGO a break and give shallow, baseless girls a go. When you're 40, married with kids LEGO will still be readily available, 20 something young women not so much. :wink: 
    Best advice. Enjoy your youth. Honestly Lego is a burden to a degree. It's expensive, takes up a lot of space and easily gathers dust. Be free and explore the world while you still can.  Then when you're 40, settled down and bored you can have your affair with Lego. 
    cheshirecatTheBigLegoski
  • cheshirecatcheshirecat Member Posts: 5,332
    And as expensive as LEGO is, an affair with LEGO is much cheaper than the other kind, once the lawyers get involved!
    VorpalRyuSumoLegoTheBigLegoski
  • SumoLegoSumoLego New YorkMember Posts: 11,740
    I'm not sure a pseudo-anonymous Lego messageboard is the best spot to discuss whether girls approve of your hobbies.  Or that there is some 'Sophie's Choice' between a hobby and carousing with college-age women...

    Diving into a dumpster on the outside chance there is Lego within when discussing having strangers build Lego at your house or a rented facility will always be the strangest discussion.
    VorpalRyumatticus_bricksTheBigLegoski
  • pharmjodpharmjod 1,170 miles to Wall Drug, USAMember Posts: 2,871
    @SumoLego yeah, but did those threads have a ménage á trois reference in them?
    VorpalRyuxiahnaTheBigLegoski
  • SumoLegoSumoLego New YorkMember Posts: 11,740
    ^  Well, no.

    But if there is a competition for discussion topic that most resembles a weird Penthouse Forum letter, we have a winner.

    Although, the 'Good Morning Dildo Baggins' / Bag End posts are moving up on the list...
    pharmjodxiahnamadforLEGOVorpalRyuTheBigLegoski
  • Diamondback_SixDiamondback_Six USAMember Posts: 75
    Allow me to offer a little pearl of wisdom from a few more decades on this rock... :)

    "Just be true to yourself--be who you are rather than forcing yourself to fit someone else's 'ideal.' The people who matter won't mind, and the people who mind won't matter."
    SumoLegoVorpalRyuTheBigLegoskiISDAvengertedward
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